Friday, February 17, 2006

Following Aimee's Lead!

So Aimee wanted to know what people thought about her. That could be a very scary discovery...or perhaps she may find that she knows herself very well.

We all know that these things are just for fun...right?

Okay, Well use the link below and let's just see how well you know me!

Give you a clue....patient is not a word to describe me.

Go, what are you waiting for? Hello, are you still here?
Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Pss't Pss't a little number on the opponent

Our ladies pool team has always used a little pss't,pss't voodoo thing to hex the opponent in key places of games....8 times out of 10 it works! Usually, We aren't rude to anyone (not to their face), we don't say nasty things (at more than a whisper) and normally we are the team everyone likes! Last night our opponents were pissed that we were using this technique and after getting her ass kicked she stormed out of building and proceeded to complain about us to the entire crowd that was outside having a smoke. This provided at least 20 minutes of good laughing amongst the catty ladies on our team!

Another great example of the fun we have:

Last week, one of my teammates was playing a Richard Simmons glove wearing look alike guy (RSGWLAG) and we were making fun of him. We were quite nice about it, being quiet and such until he excused himself to go to the washroom.

#1 He did not remove his glove.
#2 He was back in less than 2 minutes
#3 He was not doing the usual wiping of hands to dry them on pants to extricate moisture.
#4 He still had the glove on!

This is where we got nasty!

Teammate #1- "Excuse me did you wash those hands when you were done?
RSGWLAG- "Well you know some moms teach their kids how to clean up after a mess and my mom taught me how not to make a mess!"
Me- "Well isn't that nice, but I'd really like to know how you got that thing out of your pants, to go, without touching it!"
RSGWLAG- stunned look on face....
just as I'd finished stating this...very tall bald guy comes out of washroom.....
Me- "Never mind, I guess he did it for you!(pointing to tall guy)

Both teams break out in laughter... RSGWLAG didn't hold it against us cause when some of us were out playing on another team last night he came by to say hi!

It's all in good fun! They got their revenge by kicking our sarcastic asses 68-32! Ah, it's just a game and you win some and lose some...not a problem as long as you are having a great time!

Our sarcastic nature will never is who we are!

p.s. Aimee-2 days in a row...what have you done lately, Miss Once a Week Blogger?

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Irregularity is a big problem! Happy Blogversary to me!

So apparently it arises again to plague me! Irregularity that is. My daughter over here at Aimee's blog is complaining again about it! She's ragging on everyone. Apparently we are all delinquent.

Recently I have been haunted by the consequences of my irregularity. Yesterday I had some major dental stuff done that is mostly caused by my lack of regularly drinking milk, regular flossing and going for stress relieving therapy that would cause me to stop grinding my teeth (which is about the one thing that I do regularly).

I have not been blogging as regularly as I would like because I have been busy babysitting my new little charge, my new little job and I have been extremely lazy. This could also be because I have reached my one year blogversary (yes, exactly one year today) and have become disenchanted with the fact that everyone else has also become disenchanted and no one is blogging regularly. In fact, some people are even getting people to "guest blog" for them. This is a very interesting concept.

Anyone wanna "Guest Blog" for me and get my kid off my back? If not...well, I will make a valiant effort to become a more regular blogger.
Thursday, February 09, 2006

My granddaughter hates me!

Yesterday, Being a good Grandmother I took my granddaughter in to get fixed. NOW SHE HATES ME! Her mother does not have to deal with any of the repercussions of this event! Her mother will be greeted at the door with much love and excitement!

Last night was most traumatizing. I have never felt this way about an animal before. When we took Kilo in to get spayed, well the excitement was mine! We had just experienced her having a litter of 9 of the most adorable pitbull puppies and they were so messy! I was filled with glee at the thought that this would never happen to me again! I was totally unfazed by her glassy eyed, wobbly ass when we brought this 60 pound puppy machine home from the vet!

For Hunny it was different....she's all of 5.5 pounds (note the dot in between the 5's folks..) She's not my dog! She would not even look at me when the nice veterinarian's assistant brought her out to me. In fact she peed on me. The whole time I held her in my arms and cuddled her little shaky body she looked at the floor. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. When we got home, she couldn't get away from me fast enough. Her little eyes roamed the room for someone to save her from the horror that is her Grandmaman. Her ears perked at the sound of her Aunty Brianne running up the stairs to rescue her! She reluctantly slept with me last night(I was the only one that would have her, Aunty needs her sleep you know and well, Mommy, had run off to deal with all the stupid people at school!) This morning she woke to less nausea and although she still wouldn't look at me, she did eat two full handfuls of food from her Grandmothers loving hands. Yes folks, that is a true love of a grandchild...I didn't even hand feed my babies when they were 7 months old! Throw that piece of KFC on the high chair tray and good luck to you! LOL, okay maybe that was just a dream or maybe it only happened once..I don't remember.

I guess I'm going to have to go home early from pool tonight and suck up to the dog.
Oh that is just so WRONG in so many ways!!
Monday, February 06, 2006

A night to remember!

I wish I had brought my camera! Everyone else had camera's there! I felt like a total ass, for the record I spent at least two hours debating the tactfulness of bringing my camera to a $700 a plate SuperGala evening! What a dumbass! Anyway this post will unfortunately be pictureless.

Saturday night was AWESOME! Here are the events of the evening:

Leave in pouring rain/snow, plastic bag over head to get to car to go get Marie in neighbouring city.

Marie in car, need gas....still much for the hair doo!

It was a spectacular evening from the moment you drove into the underground parking that was reserved for the patrons of the event.
Once in the Metro Toronto Convention Center there were Mimes to direct you to the event and waiters with Champagne to greet you as you walk in the room. Yes, Champagne..I considered taking up drinking just to look fancy walking around with the champagne flute! Passed on the Champagne but took a program of the available items for the silent auction.

Open booklet to page 1:
Item #1 xxxxxxx
Donor: Friend of the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of Canada
Value: Priceless
Opening Bid $4,000. Yes folks, opening bid $4000.

Uhhummm, Okay guess I'm gonna have to pass on that item. Man, this charity has some pretty schmoozy friends! Let's just say I didn't place any silent bids on anything. I considered putting my name down on one item just to say I had but with my one else would bid and then I'd have to start having babies to give them my first born son or something!

After we had a look at everything we grabbed a little table for two, a drink from one of the 5 or 6 different free bars (martini bar, wine bar etc) some appetizers from the many tables of yummy little treasures such as coconut shrimp, skewers of some kind of marinated and grilled chicken, potstickers, spring rolls and more smoked salmon than you could shake a stick at...and sat back to listen to the wonderful little string quartet that was playing. Let's just say Marie and I are not living in the lap of most of this part of the evening was spent admiring/criticizing other people's choice of attire for this event. (Marie and I chose basic black dresses and we were most acceptable, a little plain but acceptable) One lady with bleached platinum hair chose a gold lammee (sp) jacket with pink silk embroidered pants...that was good for a "look at that one".

At around 7pm a silky male voice invited us all into the main Gala dining room. OMG! What a beautiful sight! 420 tables for 10, beautifully adorned in white and black linens, 2 boxes of chocolate at each place setting, bottles of Red wine, white wine, mineral water, regular water... all surrounding a very beautifully hand carved, hand painted, 5 foot Zebra. Yes folks the centerpiece was a 5 foot Zebra.

Introductions were made of the people gracing us with their presence at the Headtable..Owners/CEO's and their spouses of many of the Canadian Grocery food stores. A special guest singing the Canadian National anthem all followed by a dinner of Filet Mignon, Roasted Red potatoes and wonderfully steamed vegetables! Scrumptious. Dessert of white and dark chocolate mousse topped with Raspberry sauce and fresh berries was served with coffee and tea. Everything was absolutely scrumptious as you can imagine.

All this scrumptiousness was followed by Michael Buble and he gave an amazing performance to this intimate group of 4,200 people. Michael performed for approximately 90 minutes. He played all my favorites: Home, Save the Last dance, Quando, and many more. His is an amazing talent and cute to boot!

After Michael was finished crooning came the draw for the car. That's right a draw for a 2006 Corvette. Quite a nice piece of equipment. I knew from early in the evening it would be mine! How could it not be!

Well I must tell you that Karma slapped me in the face that night....remember the chick I sat giggling at her gold lammee coat and pink pants...well, she won the car. Frankly from that you know...I was meant to win the car and because I was evil and judgmental it was given to someone with a lesser fashion sense! So now no matter what she wears , she's gonna look fab in that fricking car!

It was an amazing night!

Let's not forget the goal of the evening though! The goal was to raise $3Million for the Canadian Crohn's and Colitis Foundation and my guess is they probably did all that and more!

hmmmm...back to the grind!

Friday, February 03, 2006

Dream a little Dream


So maybe this job isn't so of my clients is a huge supporter of an annual Gala in support of the Canadian Crohn's and Colitis Foundation and the charity is one that is near and dear to me because the disease touches two very dear friend's Colleen and Marty. This year I have been given a ticket ($700) to attend and it's tomorrow night! I am going with my boss and his wife and another girl in our office that I really like so it's gonna be a very good night! If you read my blog regularly you will note that I am supposed to be hosting a birthday party, but Hubby's gonna have to handle that. I love you Aaron but you'll have to celebrate you b-day without me. Work calls and a dedicated employee must always put work first!

On Saturday February 4, 2006, the Grocery Industry Foundation...Together (GIFT) and the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of Canada are hosting the largest fundraising gala in Canada. The gala, also known as the SuperGala, is being held at the Metro Toronto Convention Centre in Toronto. 4,000 glamorous guests will spend the evening dining and dancing, and Vancouver's swing sensation Michael Bublé will bring the night to a close. We hope to raise 3 million dollars with half of the proceeds going to the CCFC for IBD research.

That's from the Crohn's and Colitis website! I'm gonna be one of the 4,000 Glamorous Guests!!!

At this Black Tie Gala event they always have a silent auction and fun events leading to a wonderful dinner and then on to some special Canadian talent that entertains the crowd. One year they had The Tragically Hip....this year, it's Michael Buble! For those that don't know of him, his velvety voice sings wonderful beautiful songs new and old. My favorite is Home! He also does versions of Mack the Knife, Dream a Little Dream. Wanna know more go to His website even plays my fav song while you browse. After Michael sings and swings a few the evening continues it's festivities with more fun events that include a prize of a new car...a you never know...Dream a little Dream!

So, hmmmm...whatever will I wear?? Black Tie? No problem, I'll find something!!!

Are you jealous? Huh? Are you!! Yes, Yes you should be!
I'll fill you all in next post!
Gotta make an appointment to get my hair beautified!
Thursday, February 02, 2006

Stop the Train I Wanna Get Off!!!!

How much madness can one person survive before they feel the need to seek out the nearest firearm and blow off their own kneecaps!

I've always felt that my appreciation of all things good and nice and organized would bring a sense of comfort and joy to my world. Kind of like the 3 Wise Men to the Baby know what I mean. It would come to me because I practice all of these things in my work environment. I am good and I get things done for my clients (when I have too)...I am always nice to them (to their face) and organization is just a skill that enables me to chase down and point out other peoples short comings, kind of like hunting without automatic weapon.

This new job is killing my sense of humour! I used to I cry! I used to I scream. Once upon a time I had nice hair, oh wait that was the 80's and it was of course a matter of opinion on whether it was nice. I used to smile....and now the stress is causing me to clench my teeth so much my pearly whites are loosening at the root, requiring dental surgery and more!

I need to find a new way to relax and enjoy the moment. Perhaps huge amounts of Jack and this time I'm referring to our friend in the bottle! Hell any suggestions?

So if the postings don't seem so funny and the smile doesn't seem so bright, well clearly you'll understand!
Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Did you buy the tickets?

As you all know Hubby works nights and I work days. We both have very busy schedules. Hubby has been working longer shifts for the past week in an effort to convince his shift supervisor to give him the most important of all Manly Holy Days (Super Bowl Sunday in case you don't follow manly religious holidays) off. Apparently it worked and the whole shift is going in on Saturday to make up for Sunday night...he's a smart and talented guy that man of mine! I've been working long hours and missing him at night. Usually we get at least a couple of hours together most evenings before he leaves for work. This morning I had the pleasure of his smiling face when I came downstairs after my shower and the conversation went a little like this:

Me: Who is this strange man in my house?
Hubby: Tis I, your Manly Man come to hug you before you run off into the day!
Both: LOL
I move into the bearhug that awaits me and resting my head on his chest
Me: I don't wanna go to work...
Hubby: Me neither...I never wanna work again!
Me: Did you get the lottery tickets?
Hubby: No, didn't you?

This folks is why we will work for what we have and earn every penny of our humble existence. I think this is how God intended it to be and I'm good with that!

p.s. spoke with my Mother today and her son arrives in Florida on Saturday! LOL

Have a great day all!