part three and the saga continues.....
Taking the time to write about my past has been somewhat cathartic. I mean the emotional purging not the bowel kind, although sometimes....well we'll not go there. Sometimes it's difficult to look back on so many stupid decisions and find any semblance of sanity! Then there are times when I look at the times I started over or moved on and want to slap myself on the back and say good for you....feelings so mixed. So many hurt feelings, so much risk of damaging little lives that were in my care; decisions made that in hindsight could have been absolutely horrible except for the grace of God and my Mom and Dad, I think!
Anyway, part three finds me and my three little treasures in a rented old farmhouse, in the middle of city, by ourselves again. Although the rent was reasonable, the utilities were exorbitant! This old house had a lot of good things going for it. It was centrally located, a block from my Paternal Grandmother's house, a huge yard for the kids to play in a relatively upscale neighborhood just a 10 minute's drive from my Mom and Dads. The other good thing it had going for it was a spare room on the main floor that could be rented out.
To me, a single mom with no money, this seemed like the answer to my immediate problem of greater cash outlay than cash! Immediately, I rented the room to a guy that I had become friends with that had just lost his place due to a split with his girlfriend. The extra money that this provided me was the difference between struggling just to keep oil in the furnace to eating well and a night or two out on the town.
Unfortunately, this second source of income soon found a new girlfriend to move in with and I loss that little taste of freedom.
One night at pool, I mentioned to an older gentleman on my team that I needed to replace that income and he suggested that his son move in and rent that room from me.
His son had just moved to Canada from Los Angeles and had unfortunately worn out his welcome at his dad's seniors apartment.
I offered for him to move in to our home. He accepted. He lived with us for an entire year. He became a part of our family. He became my best friend until one day I got notified that I had been accepted into social housing and he couldn't come with us. It was a time that was filled with mixed emotions, I was finally going to be living in housing that I could afford but I would miss his opinions on the guys I was dating and the kids would miss his advice on how to deal with their crazy mom!
He moved in with an acquaintance of mine into a room that she had for rent. We would still see each other in social settings...it became soon became obvious that he hated his new living arrangements and that we missed him being a part of our everyday lives. It became evident that there was only one thing to do.....despite the cautionary warnings of our common friends, we started dating. Many people warned us that we were ruining a really good friendship by moving to this new level.
He moved out of his bad rooming situation into an apartment with a guy that he worked with and we continued to explore this new dating phenomenon.
After about 6 months of this new exploration, he proposed and I accepted. When we announced to the world that we going to cement our relationship under the law and get married we received nothing but grief from our friends and from his father. One night his father actually verbally attacked me in the bar at pool.
I totally understood his concern. I had been married before. I had three kids. I wasn't going to have any more.
These were all things that we had discussed. My former roommate and now fiancee assured me that none of these things were important to him. He loved me, he loved my kids and for him that was enough. That is what he told his father.
That was 11 years ago.
This year we celebrated our 9th anniversary and he's still alive. I haven't poisoned him and he hasn't stabbed me!
He is the love of my life and he can read....and he can write and he makes me laugh. He loves my kids. He thinks my Dad is hilarious and he loves my Mom. He is a true part of our family and most importantly, he loves and respects me!
This story hasn't even come near an end.....fortunately for me.....there are many new and exciting adventures ahead of us!
Anyway, part three finds me and my three little treasures in a rented old farmhouse, in the middle of city, by ourselves again. Although the rent was reasonable, the utilities were exorbitant! This old house had a lot of good things going for it. It was centrally located, a block from my Paternal Grandmother's house, a huge yard for the kids to play in a relatively upscale neighborhood just a 10 minute's drive from my Mom and Dads. The other good thing it had going for it was a spare room on the main floor that could be rented out.
To me, a single mom with no money, this seemed like the answer to my immediate problem of greater cash outlay than cash! Immediately, I rented the room to a guy that I had become friends with that had just lost his place due to a split with his girlfriend. The extra money that this provided me was the difference between struggling just to keep oil in the furnace to eating well and a night or two out on the town.
Unfortunately, this second source of income soon found a new girlfriend to move in with and I loss that little taste of freedom.
One night at pool, I mentioned to an older gentleman on my team that I needed to replace that income and he suggested that his son move in and rent that room from me.
His son had just moved to Canada from Los Angeles and had unfortunately worn out his welcome at his dad's seniors apartment.
I offered for him to move in to our home. He accepted. He lived with us for an entire year. He became a part of our family. He became my best friend until one day I got notified that I had been accepted into social housing and he couldn't come with us. It was a time that was filled with mixed emotions, I was finally going to be living in housing that I could afford but I would miss his opinions on the guys I was dating and the kids would miss his advice on how to deal with their crazy mom!
He moved in with an acquaintance of mine into a room that she had for rent. We would still see each other in social settings...it became soon became obvious that he hated his new living arrangements and that we missed him being a part of our everyday lives. It became evident that there was only one thing to do.....despite the cautionary warnings of our common friends, we started dating. Many people warned us that we were ruining a really good friendship by moving to this new level.
He moved out of his bad rooming situation into an apartment with a guy that he worked with and we continued to explore this new dating phenomenon.
After about 6 months of this new exploration, he proposed and I accepted. When we announced to the world that we going to cement our relationship under the law and get married we received nothing but grief from our friends and from his father. One night his father actually verbally attacked me in the bar at pool.
I totally understood his concern. I had been married before. I had three kids. I wasn't going to have any more.
These were all things that we had discussed. My former roommate and now fiancee assured me that none of these things were important to him. He loved me, he loved my kids and for him that was enough. That is what he told his father.
That was 11 years ago.
This year we celebrated our 9th anniversary and he's still alive. I haven't poisoned him and he hasn't stabbed me!
He is the love of my life and he can read....and he can write and he makes me laugh. He loves my kids. He thinks my Dad is hilarious and he loves my Mom. He is a true part of our family and most importantly, he loves and respects me!
This story hasn't even come near an end.....fortunately for me.....there are many new and exciting adventures ahead of us!
posted by Anonymous at 5:07 pm
1 Comments:
that is sweet..did his dad ever warm up to the arrangement??
Your parents are snowbirds now aren't they?
Post a Comment
<< Home